My infant is straight off her rocker. I was even warned this might be the case almost from the get-go. She was less than 12 hours old and her pediatrician said SHE would be our little rascal… I didn’t believe her… um, have you met my toddler, the one with the bouncy blonde head of curls? Ya, that kid be cray cray. However, I’ve learned there’s different types of crazy. And lucky me, I now have a variety of crazies in my house. The toddler is just extremely, like, over the top, opinionated. She’s very articulate and verbal, and she knows exactly what she wants. If she wakes up wanting ice cream, she’ll say, “mama I want avocado ice cream for breakfast, prease.” Obviously I don’t give it to her. Let the fit ensue… In her mind, she articulated and politely requested her desire. OBVIOUSLY this meant she should get it. Next lesson: life isn’t always fair, deal with it! So I guess that’s not crazy, it’s more just difficult to deal with. Now the infant. Dear goodness! The pediatrician maaaaay have been onto something with her. In fact, it’s sorta strange, but I think she hit the nail on the head. How this woman could tell a newborn would be a ‘rascal?’ No clue. But she’s right. And I’m scared.
You might be wondering HOW at almost 5 month old can be a rascal? Well… she won’t drink a bottle unless it’s HOT. This came months after trying to breastfeed and her being too particular about my ‘flow.’ So I pump and bottle (only AFTER I warm the freshly pumped milk) TMI? Get over it, it’s real life. And then, her sleeping. LORD HELP ME. She breaks through 2 of those fancy swaddlers. 2 different brands, on at the same time. And still, her little hand reaches through the neck hole, straight into her mouth. Which then entertains her, not soothes her. All those dumb parenting books, riddle me this! So I’m going to write a parenting book. And it’s going to be about what parents REALLY need in order to survive infancy and toddlerhood: duct tape, ear plugs, coffee, ice cream, and in the event you have both an overly opinionated toddler and a lunatic infant, you may want to get a Costco membership so you can buy the big bottles of adult beverages.
On the flip side, my kids are way cute. So, at 5 am when the infant is slurping on her hand, YET AGAIN, and smiles at me, then laughs, all is forgiven. Thank goodness for coffee. And ice cream.
I have a bowl of ice cream every.single.night. The days can be long sometimes and it’s how I unwind. It might be a problem. I make most of the flavors I post on here just a couple of times, then move onto a new flavor I become obsessed with for the week. But this flavor, THIS Mascarpone Mudslide Ice Cream, I’ve made it the most of any flavor on my blog (even more than buttermilk!) It’s so easy because you just throw everything into a blender, then into the ice cream maker. No custard base required. YET, it’s only of the most creamy and luxurious tasting ice creams. So ding dang delicious! I might need to whip up another batch tonight!